如何委婉地拒绝他人?

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I have been in this situation before but this one seems especially akward to me. She's a good customer of mine and knows I'm single. She's very nice but 15 years older and very plain- just not my type. I've never flirted with her at all- have just always been nice to her. So tonight at work she tells me that she thinks I'm really nice and wants to get to know me better and would I call her. On the spot I said ok- which I guess in a way was leading her on. So now I've got to call her....I know someone out there has been in this spot and I'm looking for the most tactful to get out of this while not hurting her feelings if possible. Thank you so much.

(楼主)我以前也曾处理过类似的情况,但这次的似乎特别棘手。她是我的主顾,而且知道我正单身。虽然人挺好但是比我大15岁,而且相貌平平--反正不是我喜欢的类型。我也没有跟她打情骂俏,只是态度上比较亲切。结果今晚上班的时候她跟我说,她觉得我是个不错的男人,希望了解我更多,让我今晚打电话给她。现在,我不得不拿起听筒。。。我知道有人也有过类似经验,谁能告诉我怎么摆脱这窘境而又尽可能不伤害到她。谢谢了。

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原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.com 翻译:带刺的玫瑰 转载请注明出处

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It will always depend upon the way you say things…

就看你怎么说了。

Suggestion:

1. Talk about your mother/older sister/ teacher in grade school/ when she is around and tell her how she reminds you of them.

建议:当她在你身边时就常说,她让你想起了你的母亲/大姐/老师。。。

Sometimes we misunderstand people around us.

Sometimes we are reminded of someone that means so much thus the closeness

Sometimes it is just motherly/sisterly friendly.

Let us just hope it is one of those.

有时,我们会误解身边的人。

有时,我们也会因为过于亲近,而被别人赋予了不一般的意义。

有时,这只是一种朋友/姐弟/母子,关系。。。

希望这只是其中之一吧。

Nice guys like us always just walk into these situations. When you call, remain non-commital. If she wants to meet for coffee (the usual "next step"), it's up to you. Would you like to have this woman for a friend, but not a more serious relationship?

像哥这样的好男人时常都会遇上这种情况呢。打电话的时候马虎敷衍一下,如果她情你去喝咖啡,你就得先想想要不要这样一个朋友了,或者超越朋友?

Before you call, do some thinking and ask yourself what the ideal relationship would be between you and her, then gear it toward that ideal. If you get some "voices" in your head, follow through on what they say.

在你打电话之前,扪心自问下你心中和她的理想关系是怎样的,然后向那一目标前进。如果你能听到自己真正的心声,那就遵从那个声音吧。

Women have told me that friends are much more difficult to find than lovers. It may be that she is only after friendship, too. I am privileged to be an extremely close friend with a woman I met; neither of us really want it to go anywhere else than that, but we enjoy hanging out and doing things together, and the friendship is of utmost importance to us. I can honestly say it is one of the more rewarding friendships I've ever had; it's a rush to be such an important part of someone else's life.

女人们告诉我说,找朋友比找情人还要难得多。也许她真的是想跟你做朋友。哥有幸成为了一个女人的闺中密友,我们都坚守这一尺度而不想继续深入,但我们都很享受在一起的感觉。而这份友情对我们来说也十分重要。我可以说这比我以前得到的友情更有价值,成为别人生命中如此重要的一部分如此让人措手不及。

原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.com 翻译:带刺的玫瑰 转载请注明出处

So call her, get to know her -- you might be pleasantly surprised. Best of luck to you, man.

打电话给她吧,了解她吧--乃也许能得到惊喜。给你最好的祝愿哦。

hang out with her and make it clear you want to be nothing more than friends at this point. and that you're flattered that she wants to be with you, but you're not ready for anything serious.

约她出去,讲明白你跟她除了朋友什么都不想做,她的追求让你受宠若惊,但你对更深一步的发展没有准备。

Tell her you're gay. That way you won't hurt her feelings.

跟她说你是个基佬。这样就不会伤害到她的感情了。

If you aren't comfortable with that, then be a man and tell her what's up. Not your type. Sorry. Kick rocks.

如果你不好意思这么说,那就像个男人那样直接告诉她,嘛事,你不是俺的菜,抱歉,然后闪人。

umm how old r u?...u already messed up boi by saying you will call her...can't help you there lol...there ain't nothing nice you can do now

嗯。。。你多大了?你说会跟她打电话就已经搞砸了。。。帮不了你咯,哈哈。。。你必须得去伤她心才行了。

u have two options:

1- call her then after a very short while tell her it won't work out

2- call her and tell her u think she's a nice FRIEND, she'll get the point.

你有两个选择。

1,打个电话,沉默片刻,说,这是不可能的。

2,打个电话,说,你是一个好朋友,她懂的。

I would tell her that your not ready to date right now. It's a lie but I think a good one. I used that on this guy for a while and the entire time we remained friends and no one was hurt.

我会告诉她我还没准备好约会,这是个谎话,但是善意的。我用这招在男人身上屡试不爽,没人受伤。

say what you really feel.

but say you still wanna be good friends or

something so she's not offended. lol.

说出心里话。

但表示你还是想跟她做朋友,避免她发飙哈。

原创翻译:龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.com 翻译:带刺的玫瑰 转载请注明出处

just say you know i really appreciate the compliment but i,m not interested i got to many things going on in my life and don,t feel that i can get involved with anyone at this time

就说你很感谢她的这份爱慕,但自己没有兴趣。因为眼下生活中有太多事情,不想把别人牵扯进来。

This is easy. Call her and tell her that your company has a "no dating" policy and while you think she is nice, you have to be the example and play by the rules or else your other employees will not adhere to the policy. Then say, of course Im not assuming you liked me in that way, I just wanted to put that on the table.

这很容易。就说你公司规定不准拍拖。虽然对她有好感,但是作为模范员工要带头遵守公司纪律云云。。。当然不是摆高姿态,但得公事公办。

Sit next to them, say "I like your shoes" , then attack. Got it all memorized.

在她旁边坐下来,说“我喜欢你的鞋子”,然后突然袭击。此情可待成追忆。

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